Tuesday, April 19, 2011

To write or not to write. THAT is the question.

image source here

Yesterday was the first day of Beyond Blogging for Scrapbookers.  I got so caught up in looking through people's blogs that I 1) didn't get to write my own entry, and 2) forgot to feed my kid lunch.  Yeah... it was probably a good thing that she was going to be with her grandmother for the rest of the day.  

Quite a few people wrote about how they started blogging and why.  I wrote my own version of it about a year ago and I had to go back and re-read it.  It's fascinating how different my thoughts are now from what they were back then.  Yes, blogging is still a good way for me to "focus", but I wonder how much of that has kept me from writing these past few months.   Could I have written more if I wasn't so busy censoring myself?

I started out blogging as a way to get in touch with some people working through Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way.  Once I felt more comfortable sharing my writing, it became a way to let friends and distant family know what was going on in my family's life.  One thing was certain, I wrote quite sporadically.  Not only would I disappear for indeterminate lengths of time, but I would be full of optimism one minute and doom and gloom the next.  My sister once told me she could tell when I was depressed from reading my entries. That brought me here.  

I originally created this new(er) blog in hopes to stay away from any negativity on my part.  I wasn't quite sure WHAT I would be writing about, but I knew I wanted to focus on the positive.  I was even doing alright for a while until the end of November and the entire month of December.  How could I stay positive after that?  And so I stopped writing.  Again.  I mean, who wants to read about depression?  But now I wonder.  Is it possible to avoid writing about it when I DO suffer from depression?  I STILL want to focus on the positive side of my life.  Surely, I can find something to write about that won't bring everyone down.  If nothing else, I could always post a photograph instead.  So here I am now.  Taking yet another class.  Hoping that it will help me find my online voice.  I know I want to write.  I know I love to read creative and inspiring blogs.  I DON'T want to be a downer.  But could I really still find my voice if I omit a part of myself?  How does one decide what to keep in and what to leave out?  What would you do? 

I guess it's a good thing I've signed up for this class. =)

2 comments:

  1. I think, if it is important to you, and you are being real with your audience, you should put in what you want... and if it is about feeling depressed, there is a place for that, and maybe others who need it.

    I am so sorry you have been through so much in the past several months. I don't even know what to say because there are no words to soften the blows.

    Hugs.

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  2. i have no idea what i would do cuz i'm in the same boat as you. :D hence the reason for bfth! you got started. you're writing. and publishing. that's a first step. keep pushing through! i guess it's like giving birth. ? it's painful but you gotta stick to it? lol

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